I was thinking, I have toiled in vain.
I have exhausted myself for nothing.
Faith seems to diminish rather than gain.
Am I good for nothing.

And then as in my dream I thought of religion rather than being low.
I began to look up.
I seemed to see a small triangle of light as in an attic window.
This was like a nourishing spiritual  cup.

Again in my dream I was running away at work.
I came across an old room and mass being said.
Again peace seemed to seep from the very brickwork.
Hope was alive and no longer dead.

Elizabeth despaired of having a child .
But a future blessing can never just be for ever filed.

……..

Do we toil in vain
Exhaust ourselves for nothing
There is always hope

……..

See Isaiah 49 : 1-6

Such pretence does not square with our time of life.
Many would suppose that Eleazar had conformed.
We will not have to go under the knife.
But our faith has constantly to be reaffirmed.

I was looking at some clouds passing by.
Suddenly I seemed to know that all this was myth.
We are alone , there is no God , it’s all a lie.
There is no working heavenly smith.

But then I thought again.
The clouds had a sunset glow.
All this beauty , passing summer rain.
Did it come of itself, just a chance stain.

There has to purpose in this rain.
Eleazar did not die in vain.

………

What is the purpose
Who maintains the universe
Is it more than love

……..

See 2 Maccabees 6

There is a new creation.
The old creation has gone.
Freeing us from all damnation.
Ensuring we are never alone.

Now the new creation is here.
It is all God’s work.
We need not fear.
For all around is his handiwork.

God was reconciling the world to himself.
Not holding men’s faults against them.
Or against ourself.
And even now we do not know the outcome.

So we are ambassadors for Christ.
And we make our appeal in the name of Christ.

……

A new creation
The old creation is gone
Now and for ever

……

See 2 Corinthians 5

No one knows the son except the father.
Just as no one knows the father except the son.
Reading these words I seemed to see further and further.
I was not blinded by earth, it’s cares and the sun.

Come to me all ye who Labour and are overburdened.
And I will give you rest.
In these moments my faith was strengthened.
It seemed to find at least for now, new zest.

Shoulder my yoke and learn from me.
For I am gentle and humble in heart.
Now just for an instant in church I could see.
I could understand if only in that moment, it was a start.

This the sacred heart is here.
Helping to remove all care.

……….

Jesus’ sacred heart
We know it’s always with us
If we choose to see.

……. ..

See Matthew 11 : 25-30

I

¢

The Israelites could not bear looking at the face of Moses
Although it was a brightness that faded.
We who live now cannot ask for less.
Even if our faith is so jaded.

How much greater will be the brightness.
That surrounds the administering of the spirit.
This is the test of our fitness.
Even if we have no merit.

Our faith is spirit embedded.
Not some dry thing just from a book.
A radiance is encountered.
We don’t even need to look.

Compared with this greater splendour.
What used to have much now seems to have no splendour.

……….

The spirit’s brightness
Is then so overwhelming
And encompassing

……..

See 2 Corinthians 3, 4-11

Your will is wonderful indeed.
The unfolding of your word gives light.
You are the all encompassing seed
As long as we keep you always in sight.

I open my mouth and I sigh.
As I yearn for your commands
I cannot and will not lie
I must hold out to you my hands,

Let my steps be guided by your promise.
Let no evil rule me.
I wish I could follow you like St Thomas.
I can only make my plea.

Let your face shine upon your servant.
Let me be more fervent.

………..

Your wonder will
Your unfolding word gives light
Guided by promise

….

See Psalm 118

Happy the gentle.
They shall have the earth for their heritage.
We must take on a new mantle.
For a new age.

Happy those who mourn.
They shall be comforted.
Beckoning for us , a new morn
All is spiritually related.

Happy those who hunger and thirst for what is right.
They shall be satisfied.
Against all might.
To earth we are not tied.

The beatitudes are right.
We must keep them in sight.

………

Happy those who mourn
They shall then be comforted
We also will be

…….

See Matthew 5 : 1-12

Man does not live on bread alone.
Man lives on everything that comes from the Lord.
We only have to atone.
And live again bound by new life’s cord.

Half asleep , waking today.
I dreamt I loved the whole world.
And all its people all religious and lay.
All dislikes , resentments away hurled.

What a delightful feeling.
Of course it didn’t last.
These feelings come with dreaming not living.
I’m not yet at all ready for the holy cast.

But as long as there are dreams .
Everything is not as it drearily seems.

………

Live on bread alone
Man does not need to do that
For he has God’s word

…. ..

See Deuteronomy 8 : 2-3 ,  14-16

What about your own alms.
Your own good work.
Is it good enough to sing our psalms.
And meanwhile our doubts lurk.

Blind Tobit was told by his wife.
Everyone knows what return you have had for your good works.
Our own doubt is rife .
Our own regret for our life lurks.

Tobit did not know there were sparrows above his head.
Their hot droppings fell into his eyes.
Sometimes we just feel bled.
Surrounded by lies.

But Tobit’s agony was coming to an end.
God and fate do not give, they only lend.

………

What about your alms
Your own good work that you do
Are you recognised

………

See Tobit 2 : 9-14

Your feasts will be turned to mourning.
And all your songs to lamentation.
We have received our warning.
And this applies to us whatever our station.

To it’s  neighbours laughed and said.
See he is not afraid anymore.
But that is only true after we are dead.
We must then settle our score.

The time before this he had to flee.
But here he is beginning to bury his dead again.
We ourselves make our plea.
But we are always going against the grain.

Do we, like Tobit, walk in the paths of truth.
Or did we leave behind all that in our youth.

………

Feasts turned to mourning
Songs to lamentation
Is that then our lot

………

See Tobit 1 : 3 , 2  :  1-8

Moses went up the mountain.
As the Lord had commanded.
With countless stars can faith be certain.
How can we assume all will indeed be mended.

I dreamt that faith was indeed a mountain.
And all our efforts a mere ant hill
But I still remained uncertain.
Was the universe in comparison not a continent not some high hill.

All this is true even infernal.
And then I saw one small man, Jesus walking.
He alone proclaimed that we are eternal.
He alone provides for our reawakening.

It does not matter that we are a mere piece of cosmic dust.
With faith our soul will not die or rust.

…….

We on our ant hill
Stand before the universe
But one man gives hope

………

See Exodus 34 : 4-6 , 8-9

Some have left no memory.
And disappeared as if they had not existed.
We may leave no trace , never leave our territory.
We appear among the unlisted.

They are now as if they had never been.
And so to their children after them.
They do not now see nor are they seen.
We ask ourselves , are we like them.

But here is a list of generous men.
Whose good works have not been forgotten.
They will be seen again.
And we too pray we will remain begotten.

But for all there is some kind of inheritance.
And even some feeling of sense.

……….

They the disappeared
They can leave no memory .
And then what of us

……. ..

See Ecclesiasticus 44: 1, 9-13