TUESDAY 21 JANUARY 2020

We went to three very different services this weekend in Lincolnshire.

On Friday in Binbrook Parish Church to the funeral of Norah Douglas, who died at the age of 92. An occasion to celebrate a life well spent.

On Saturday to the last weekend service at Bardney, due to a shortage of priests. If we could ordain married permanent deacons, many of outstanding merit and maturity we wouldn’t have this problem in rural areas throughout Europe.

On Sunday we went to Evening prayer in our village church. A lovely Anglican tradition. Out of all the services what the priest said struck me the most. He was commenting on the Gospel around the baptism. Jesus tells his new disciples: “Come and see” and “Go and Tell”. Good advice for all of us…

SUNDAY 19 JANUARY 2020

This Sunday we go to the last weekend service at Bardney. A really nice atmosphere and a skilful exegesis on the Gospel reading, showing how all the readings tie in together. Jesus is the Lamb of God and as He dies on the Cross the lambs are sacrificed in the Temple. All the readings point to the same thing: He is the new sacrifice.

30 December 2019 – Monday

I was sitting in our village church. The bright winter sun streaming in from the windows facing south made a play of light on the wall, giving a sense of calm transcendence and movement, yet always the same.

“Sing a new song unto the Lord. Sing unto the Lord, all the whole earth” (Ps 96)

29 December 2019 – Sunday

Ecclesiasticus is full of good advice. I like the bit about looking after the old dad: “Even if his mind should fail, show him sympathy.”

And of course the exhortation for husbands which is known so well. Better not write it down in case I fall short…

27 December 2019 – Feast of St John

“He saw and he believed.”

The first to do so and the only one to stand at the foot of the cross. If one could be with anyone in history would it not be he?

After communion the priest kept a silence. The atmosphere was so heavy with the presence of God, you could cut it with a knife.

Christmas Day

In all the glorious magnificence of Midnight Mass in Latin one phrase stands out and is endlessly repeated in my brain.
In the second reading of St Paul’s letter to Titus:

“What we must do is give up everything that does not lead to God and all worldly ambition.”

22 December 2019 – Fourth Sunday of Advent

Today is the last Sunday in Advent and at Mass we have the collect said every day in the Angelus.

As I sit later alone in the village church, with the afternoon light streaming in, it is a beautiful thing again to read. Again a great sense of a presence.

“Pour forth we beseech you O Lord your grace into our hearts that we, to whom the incarnation of Christ Your Son was made known by the message of an angel, may, by His Passion and Cross, be brought to the glory of His resurrection.”

Apparently more people believe in Angels than God. But then where do they come from? We should certainly treat casual strangers in the street well. They may be an angel.

21 December 2019 – Saturday

Saturday 21st December. The shortest day.

I am alone in the village church at dusk at 4 o’clock. All is hushed and fading. The pictures inside the church merging into the gloom.

I read The Song of Songs:

“Come then my love, my lovely for see winter is past.”

I sit silent and feel that presence of God that only comes in true loneliness. But a joyful one. A profound sense.

Sunday 24 March Third Sunday in Lent

“Do you suppose these Galileans who suffered like that were greater sinners than any other? They weren’t.” (Luke 13:1-9)

To what do we owe chance?

Monday 25 March The Annunciation of the Lord

Lovely to have this beautiful feast in the middle of Lent. We are at the 10:30 Mass in the Cathedral.

The beautiful words at the end of the Magnificat:

“Let what you have said be done to me, and the Angel left her.” (Luke 1:26-38)

Tuesday 26 March

I feel guilty: I have given up absolutely nothing for Lent. I can’t be bothered – not even angered by five hundred hours of Brexit debate.

“Not seven, I tell you, but seventy seven.” (Matthew 18:21-35)

How many times do we forgive? Once, or not at all?

Wednesday 27 March

“Do not imagine that I have come to abolish the law or the prophets.” (Matthew 5:17-19)

A demanding passage, but view it as an injunction to keep trying rather than to be overcome by a sense of failure.

Having met with Orthodox Jews at the inaugural meeting of the Values Foundation, they have been teaching their children their faith for five thousand years. I am one of just twenty-one to vote against compulsory relationships and sex education.

Thursday 28 March

“He who is not with me is against me. And he who does not gather with me scatters.” (Luke 11:14)

Is this a command to be with him always? So easy to say – so difficult to do.

Friday 29 March

“You are not far from the Kingdom of God.” (Mark 12:28-34)

This is what we would all like to hear. Can we live a life to make it happen?

Saturday 30 March

The village church is locked all day, so I just read Universalis.

“I thank you God that I am not grasping, unjust, adulterous, like the rest of mankind, and particularly that I am not like this tax collector here.” (Luke 18:9-14)

Are we too often like that?

Sunday 17 March Second Sunday in Lent

I am at the large church near the Place Victor Hugo in Paris. I have Universalis so I can follow the readings.

“The Lord is my light and my help. Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life. Before whom shall I shrink?”

Monday 18 March

No time today in Paris to go to Mass, but I can read Universalis.

“Do not treat us according to our sins, O Lord.”

Tuesday 19 March St Joseph’s Day

Mass in St Joseph’s Chapel. Lovely to have the Mass in Latin with the priest facing away.

“Behold a faithful and prudent shepherd whom the Lord set over his household.”

Wednesday 20 March

A swim in the Serpentine and then some breakfast but back in time for Mass.

“Anyone who wants to be great among you must be your servant and anyone who wants to be first among you must be your slave.”

Thursday 21 March

I go to the 10:30 Mass.

“Test me, O God, and know my thoughts. See that my path is not wicked and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Friday 22 March

“But his brothers came to hate him [Joseph] so much that they could not say a civil word to him.” (Genesis 37)

It’s strange how hatred can grow from anything, even a father’s love for a son.

Saturday 23 March

I have a short time in the 10:30 sung Latin Saturday morning Mass – the most beautiful of the week. Why did we ever give it up? A little gem in the middle of London.

Sunday 10 March 1st Sunday in Lent

“I will give you all this power and the glory of these kingdoms.” (Luke 4:1-13)

How and why do we strive for power or influence or recognition? How difficult to give Jesus’s answer: You must worship the Lord your God and serve Him alone.

Monday 11 March

“I tell you solemnly, in so far as you did this to one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it to me.” (Matthew 25:31-46)

Isn’t this the most difficult injunction of all? Do we visit the sick, those in prison?

Tuesday 12 March

I go to Mass and think on today’s psalm: “The Lord rescues the just in all their distress.”

I think all those who come forward to take communion should be welcomed whatever their state of mind.

“I sought the Lord and He answered me. From all my terrors He set me free.”

Wednesday 13 March

I go to our Mass in the crypt.

“Remember your companion, O Lord, and your merciful love, for they are from of old.” (Entrance Antiphon)

Thursday 14 March

“O Lord, give heed to my sighs. Attend to the sound of my cry, my king and my god.”

I have sent off my letter to the Holy Father in which I ask for zero tolerance of clerical abusers. We will see what answer we get.

Friday 15 March

“If you, O Lord, should mark our guilt, who would then survive?”

Saturday 16 March

I read a psalm in our village church. KJV because that is in the Book of Common Prayer they have there. But here it is in modern speak: “They are happy whose life is blameless, who follow God’s law. They are happy who do His will, serving Him with all their hearts.” (Psalm 118)

3 March 2019 – Eighth Sunday Ordinary Time

We are at Mass in the Mass House at Osgodby, just three of us and Father Robert sings it in Latin for me, facing the altar.

In a shaken sieve the rubbish is left behind. So too the defects of man appear in his tail. (Ecclesiasticus 27, 5)

Monday 4 March

I am at Mass in the Cathedral at 10.30.

“Go and sell everything you own and give the money to the poor.”

This is what we are supposed to concentrate on but I prefer this phrase: “Jesus looked steadily at him and loved him.” (Mark 10:17-27)

He loves our lack of will and imperfections.

Tuesday 5 March

I go to Mass in the Cathedral.

“The Lord became my protector. He brought me out to a place of freedom. He saved me because he delighted in me.” (Entrance Antiphon)

I write a letter to the Pope – not something one does every day – and I imagine he gets rather too many letters.

Ash Wednesday 6 March

I go as usual to the 5:30 Mass in the Cathedral. There are various distractions. I worry if I am in someone’s seat but nothing can take away from Allegri’s Miserere. It’s lovely that Ben and Theo come to Mass.

As the priest says this is like any other 5:30 Mass just a little busier. Or is it?

“Sound the trumpet in Zion. Order a fast. Proclaim a solemn assembly.”

Friday 8 March

“Why is it that we and the Pharisees fast, but your disciples do not?” (Matthew 9)

I think on my poor fasting!

Saturday 9 March

“It is not those who are well who need the doctor, but the sick.” (Luke 5:22)

It is good to think on this when debating who should receive communion.

I go to evening Mass at the Cathedral. The reading sums up our dilemma: “Help the little faith I have.”

At last a senior clergyman tells it how it is. Questioned about child abuse in the Church, the Archbishop of Melbourne says: “In this area our credibility is shot to pieces.”

Progress starts with humility and a realisation that action needs taking and bishops no longer are trusted to do it.

“Happy the man who has placed his trust in the Lord.”

All too true. One certainly can’t place it in anyone else’s hands.

Today I always reflect on the Japanese martyrs and the film of their plight but perhaps the Japanese government was justified in protecting their traditional culture. We do not condone their cruelty. They would say they saved their country.

We are in Lincolnshire for a quiet day especially as we go to Mass at the Osgodby Mass House (1793) in the evening. It is a very short Mass, no sermon, but givien the place in the tiny Mass House it is spiritual for all that.

“What is your name” asked Jesus. “My name is Legion.” I don’t know why I always find that phrase chilling, and yet correct about human nature.

We are here for Mass at Holy Rood with Sophia playing in the back of the church.

“Your words are spirit, Lord, and they are life.”

In the evening I go to our church. Vicky is locking up but she allows me to sit for a moment in the darkened church.

I read Psalm 6 by the light of my phone.

“O Lord, rebuke me not in thy anger, nor chasten me in thy wrath. Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am languishing; O Lord, heal me, for my bones are troubled.”

We drive Sophia up after 8:00 am Mass.

Delightfully, in the chapel of St Paul in the cathedral, the priest faces the altar, which is more spiritual.

I go to Mass in the Cathedral. I have had difficulty in recent months with the Church. But now I sit during Vespers and the chanting gradually sinks in. I feel once again a sense of joy and fulfilment. Something utterly different from church politics and more than soothing. Joy.

I went as usual to read a psalm in our village church. The psalm of the day is Ps 99 – “Cry out with joy all the earth” – but it is more beautiful in the King James Version.

The little church was as usual empty and utterly quiet. There was a heaviness in the air and in that heaviness I felt a distant echo of something else. God or joy or the eternal, I know not what…

“Rejoice in the Lord always…”

The robes like, the liturgy, are a glorious rose colour. The rose of a new dawn.

Advent is not merely a rocky path of repentance to prepare for the Saviour, but it is too a time of joy, something much deeper and meaningful than mere happiness.

Is there poetry more sublime than that of Zephaniah?

“Shout for joy, daughter of Zion…”

The church may indeed be tossed by storms. Its helmsmen uninspiring or worse and some tossed overboard. But it is in the scriptures that hope comes not in mere men.

I apologise to anyone who may read Another Country for not updating it recently but I’m having difficulty in finding someone willing to type it up. Still, I carry on writing it for myself which is probably good enough!

This week BBC 4 is broadcasting a programme on Mindfulness from Downside Abbey. I happened to find recently what I wrote on 24 February 2005 in one of my diaries:

Downside. I arrived feeling stressed and depressed. All these attacks on MPs have got us down
Then I attended the liturgy in choir and went for a walk. I walked down “The Beautiful Valley” along a wooded stream by a green lane shaded with trees and when I looked at the stream I felt a calming and returning happiness.

Next day, Sunday afternoon, I walked in the opposite direction past the Parish Church down into another deep valley. I stood upon a wooden bridge above a rushing stream. It came to me that I should accept my job just as it is, come what may, enjoy it as best I can and not worry about the future.

By the stream I walked down a long green slope. I had in my hand Dom David Foster’s book published by Continuum, Deep calls unto Deep. I thought how impressively intellectual it was. Continuum have rejected my book The Monastery of the Mind.

This is what I really want to do, write a book which encourages prayer and meditation using the life of a Saint or perhaps an event that can be carried in the picket.

I know I can and want to do it, if I can find the time and will every day to give it a go.

I walked up to a gate and some thought rose up unannounced in my mind to anger me. I realised that if I am angry about something I just have to accept it and then I walked up the stream again and realised hoe much I love solitude. That is how I have to accept it as I am. Three streams, a hill, and a gate, some thoughts, a prayer and thanksgiving.

Eventually St Paul’s Publishing house did publish The Monastery of the Mind after every other religious publisher had rejected it.

I return often to the Monastery. The regular prayerful repetition of the psalms focuses the mind on the beauty of the present rather than any regret about the past or fear for the future.

In recent years Mindfulness has become very popular, but really it is Christian meditation without God. Indeed we have been practising Mindfulness for fifteen hundred years in our monasteries since St Benedict founded his first community.

I prefer to focus, not just on breathing, which is indeed an aid to concentration, but also on the word.

Saturday 2 September

I take the train down to a meeting of the Oblates at Downside. It’s good to be back in the Monastery. There is a seminar on the life of my friend, the charming and wonderful Dom Sebastian Moore and his impenetrable poetry. Well into his late 90s and with great courage he continued to produce a poem every day, which he typed up and handed to anyone he met. He was an enthusiast for Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now. We go on to to discuss him in the afternoon, but as usual the lovely atmosphere seeps in. I read a simple life of St Benedict. With a picture on every page it looks like a children’s book but each short passage is profound. It is written by two Spanish nuns. In the evening after Matins which we do on Saturday night, there is a lovely tableau, as I stand behind the monks while they sing the Salve Regina. After everyone leaves I sit alone in the huge darkening abbey church as twilight lengthens. The candle I light is a soft glow, visible from the far end of the abbey by the Choir. There truly is power in this Now.

I always go to bed early and happy at Downside. The peace is persuasive.

Sunday 3 September

I am up early to sit in the choir for Lauds. Being able to sit in Choir and feel part of the proceedings has transformed the Downside experience for me. The sensation of listening to the Monks chanting the Psalms is timeless. As I sit in the choir at the end of Sunday Lauds, I am always sad to be leaving. The school is still on holiday, so I can sit in the front for the 10:00 am Mass for the first time. There is a fine choir. The singing of the Ave Verum Corpus is a true Mindfulness moment.

St Thomas’ church, Market Rasen

SUNDAY 30th April – Third Sunday of Easter

Our church is closed for woodworm treatment so we use the Anglican church of St Thomas in Market Rasen for our 11.30am Mass. Our priest sings the Gloria, Kyrie, Sanctus, Angus Dei and Pater Noster in Latin. A beautiful sound in a beautiful place which may not have heard these words for a long time.

Entrance Antiphon:
“Cry out with joy to God, all the earth; O sing to the glory of His name. O render Him glorious praise. Alleluia”.

MONDAY 1st May – St Joseph the Worker

Psalm 134: Ecce Nunc
“Behold, bless ye the Lord all ye servants of the Lord which by night stand in the House of the Lord. Lift up your hands in the sanctuary and bless the Lord”.

In the afternoon I listen to some music and paint a little.

TUESDAY 2nd May – St Athanasius

I go to Mass at the Holy Rood. St Athanasius had a difficult life fighting Arianism. The passions stirred up by the dispute seem strange to us. Afterwards I canvas in Swallow.

Psalm 135: Laudate Nomen
“Praise ye the Lord, Praise ye the name of the Lord. Praise him, O ye servants of the Lord”.

WEDNESDAY 3rd May – St Philip & St James the Apostles

I canvas in Middle Rasen and in the evening we have our adoption meeting in the delightful Holton le Moor village hall. It all goes well and everyone is very friendly. I have never known such a benign political environment.

Psalm 136: Confitemini
“O give thanks unto the Lord for he is good; for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks unto the God of Gods, for his mercy endureth for ever. O give thanks to the Lord of Lords, for his mercy endureth for ever”.

THURSDAY 4th May

It is local election day for the county council.

I canvas in Glentworth, a pretty village nestling alongside Lincoln cliff edge then we spend a late evening and early hours at the count. The results are good, as good as they have ever been. We win six out of the eight wards and win back Scotter, lost in a by-election.

Psalm 137: Super Flamines – whenever one reads the words, one’s heart lifts despite their sorrowful nature …
“By the rivers of Babylon,
There we sat down, yea, we wept
When we remembered Zion.
We hung our harps
Upon the willows in the midst of it.
For there those who carried us away captive asked of us a song,
And those who plundered us requested mirth”.

FRIDAY 5th May

It feels like the day after General Election day, tired after a very late night.

Psalm 138: Confitebor Tibi
“I will praise thee with my whole heart; before the Gods I will sing praise unto thee”.

SATURDAY 6th May

I walk around Covenham reservoir. It is nice seeing the dinghies but the concrete reservoir is bleak and huge ‘No swimming’ signs are up.

Psalm 139: Domine Probasti
“O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are acquainted with all my ways”.

ALTICHIERO da Zevio, St George Slays the Dragon (1378-84), Fresco, Oratorio di San Giorgio, Padua

SUNDAY 23rd April – Divine Mercy Sunday

Apparently, according to our Parish Priest, if you go to confession over the next fourteen days and to Mass every day, all your sins are wiped clean. Quite a tempting prospect but if there is a purgatory it all seems too easy to me.

“They went to the Temple everyday but met in their homes for the breaking of bread”
Acts 2:42-47.

MONDAY 24th April – St George (martyred 303 A.D.)

We squeeze into the fine Chapel of St George in Westminster Cathedral for Mass.

Who was St George, except that he was martyred in the Diocletianic Persecution? And why is he the patron saint of England, except for that Richard I adopted him as the epitome of Christian Chivalry? Who was he and what did he do …

Anyway, the Entrance Antiphon is nice:
“Rejoice, you saints, in the presence of the Lamb; a Kingdom has been prepared for you from the foundation of the world. Alleluia”.

TUESDAY 25th April – St Mark

I chair Westminster Hall, juggling how to get fifteen colleagues in the time available and ask a question in Justice Questions.

Apparently Mark, a disciple of Peter, tells his Gospel from Peter’s point of view, but what was this scene like:
“And so the lord Jesus, after he had spoken to them, was taken up to heaven…”
Mark 16:15-20.

I often wonder, how was he taken up into heaven?

WEDNESDAY 26th April

Our APPG entertains the French Ambassador at lunch.

Macron and Le Pen are through to the final round. She says Macron is highly intelligent. We shall see. Intelligence without a parliamentary majority is not enough.

“But at night, the angel of the Lord opened the prison gates and said as he led them out ‘Go and stand in the Temple and tell the people all about this new life”
Acts 5:17-26.

THURSDAY 27th April

I ask a last question about Brexit and wait for the quaint ceremony of prorogation. One or two colleagues are sitting on the green benches for the last time. There is always the feeling: will I be returning here?

Today’s Entrance Antiphon:
“O God, when you went forth before your people, marching with them and living among them, the earth trembled, heavens poured down rain – Alleluia”.

FRIDAY 28th April

Our last surgery of this Parliament. A busy one in the Guildhall at Gainsborough, then I visit the Heritage Centre. I buy a book about the impact on the town of the First World War. The Gainsborough News is filled with the deaths of the sons of the town. Five-hundred killed during the war from the small manufacturing and market town.

In the bookshop I bought a book about childhood in the 1950s, a happy time when we could play in the street and I could cycle as a seven year old on my little red bike all the way into the City.

I also buy a book by Richard Osborne on the Universe. When you read of the extraordinary discoveries even being made as you speak, I find it difficult to reconcile with my religious faith. The more we know, the more fantastic questions arise. There seems to be less not more universal laws, more vast galaxies and black holes, the universe expanding and the parts furthest away accelerating the quickest and the weird findings from quantum mechanics and the problem of gravity, and antimatter. There may be other dimensions in the universe or other universes.

All this seems so enormous that it is difficult to understand how the God of the Bible could create it all. It is enough to shake ones belief.

Maybe our God is the creator of concepts such as truth, or love, or justice but is not the creator of the physical universe which just is, or maybe the concept of many Gods is not so daft.

Yet Christianity and religion seem correct not just by powers of reason but by one’s own inner feelings, sensations and sense of joy. God seems at once very close and very unbelievable.

One thing is certain given the immensity of the universe and its extraordinary nature: it makes our efforts on earth and our obsessions with them, parliamentary differences and hatreds in politics and religion, seem so futile. Really as we look at the night sky we should just stare and wonder. Yet we go one killing and hating each other, to what end?

Another remarkable thing is that whereas since the 1920s we have been pushing radio waves into space and listening, we have as yet heard nothing in return. If there is intelligent life in the universe, it seems very remote or may not even exist at all. We may indeed be alone, which would explain the interest a god takes in us.

Psalm 132
“Lord, remember David and all his afflictions”.

SATURDAY 29th April – St Catherine of Sienna

We canvass in Scotter and eat a takeaway fish and chip supper sitting in the churchyard of Scotter church.

Every day I am here I read a psalm in our village church, the verse of the King James Bible resonating as no other English can. Today is the turn of 133, over the weeks I have gradually worked through the previous 132.

Psalm 133: Ecce Quam Bonum
“Behold how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity”.

ANGELICO, Resurrection of Christ and Women at the Tomb (1440-42), Fresco, Convento di San Marco, Florence

SUNDAY 16th April – Easter Sunday

As Mass starts, Father Anselm leads the wonderful anthem:
“Salve, festa dies, toto venerabilis aevo, qua deus infernum vicit et astra tenet”.

It seems a suitable full-stop to the magnificent liturgy of these four days.

The only sadness is that the retreat is over for another year.

MONDAY 17th April – Easter Monday

I always love going to the Cathedral the day after Easter Sunday to see the Cathedral bedecked with lilies and the readings this week are the most important of the year. They are the witness to the Resurrection and Christianity without the Resurrection is nothing.

“Do not be afraid: go and tell my brothers that they must leave for Galilee; they will see me there”
Matthew 28:8-15.

TUESDAY 18th April – Easter Tuesday

All hell breaks loose with the PM’s announcement that there is to be a General Election on June 8th. So, we will spend the month of May in Lincolnshire. Obviously, I welcome a chance to increase our majority.

I take the opportunity in Foreign Office Questions to raise the slaughter of Shi’a civilians at Foah and Kefraya.

The wonderful Easter readings continue. All our faith is based on these few hundred words of the testimony of a handful of people. The whole thing looks sincere and I can’t help believing it but it is few words to hang the universe on, although the words are compelling.

“As she said this she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, though she did not recognise him … Jesus said ‘Mary’. She knew him then”
John 20:11-18.

WESNESDAY 19th April – Easter Wednesday

I put a question to the PM in which I describe the Fixed Term Parliaments Act as an Emperor without clothes. We duly vote to abrogate the Bill and have an early General Election.

It is clearly in the national interest to have an election when it is in the national interest to have one.

Today we have the wonderful story of the disciples walking with the Lord to Emmaus:
“… he took the bread and said the blessing; then he broke it and handed it to them. And their eyes were opened and they recognised him”
Luke 24:13-35.

For all the fragility of the evidence, our eyes too can open at such a moment.

THURSDAY 20th April – Easter Thursday

A rare event: I have two questions on the order paper to the DEFRA Secretary and answer two as Chairman of the Public Accounts Commission – an eclectic mixture of Lincolnshire coastal defences and the PAC work on cancer drugs.

I take the train up to Lincolnshire but before I do there is time to go to another Easter Week Mass.

“… They were still talking about all this when Jesus himself stood among them and said to them, ‘Peace be with you’”
Luke 24:35-48.

FRIDAY 21st April – Easter Friday

I am at a meeting to discuss the listing of the village hall – a former Methodist Tin Chapel. We know nothing about the people who worshiped there but their life in this remote spot must have been very simple.

There is no Mass at Caistor tonight so I wander around the parish church and find an extraordinary object – a fragment of a wall made up of cement and the bones of martyred Christians; nothing changes.

Today is John 21:1-14
“Jesus showed himself again to the disciples. It was by the Sea of Tiberius – the third time Jesus showed himself to the disciples”.

SATURDAY 22nd April – Easter Saturday

It is sad that these wonderful weekday readings are coming to an end but in the Mass at Market Rasen they do so in summation:

Mark 16
“Having risen in the morning on the first day of the week, Jesus appeared first to Mary of Magdala …”.

ALTDORFER, Christ on the Cross between Mary and St John (c. 1512), Staatliche Museen, Kassel

SUNDAY 9th April – Palm Sunday

We gather outside Holy Rood and stand for the long passion reading from Matthew before going back for some more fishing and lunch with all the windows open, the sights and sounds of the countryside flooding in.

Meanwhile in Syria, American warplanes have dropped more bombs.

When we have removed the detestable Assad, who then will protect the Christians? After we removed Saddam, who protected the Christians? They are not visiting the towns they fled from and which I visited. They do not dare for fear not just of ISIS but their neighbours.

MONDAY 10th April

The poetry of Isaiah, 42:1-7
“… he does not cry out or shout aloud, or raise his voice in the streets.
He does not break the crushed reed, nor quench the wavering flame…”

TUESDAY 11th April

I go to the very long Chrism Mass in the Cathedral, but quite a sight – about 200 priests in front of me all in white. The Cardinal’s sermon is soothing. I have a little sleep.

“… lay down your life for me …”

WEDNESDAY 12th April

Isaiah 50:4-9, there is no sudden conversion experience:
“Each morning he wakes me to hear,
To listen to a disciple”.

I think: when we got rid of the detestable Saddam, who then protected the Christian communities of Iraq that I visited?

THURSDAY 13th April – Maundy Thursday

I love Maundy Thursday because this is the day as in the previous thirty-three years that we drive to Downside for the Easter Retreat.

We are a little bit late but I catch enough of Father Michael’s talk to concentrate on the need for prayer.

After the Mass of the Lord’s Supper, I sit for a time in the Lady Chapel. For the first time I do not need to say words for prayer. Just be – think of myself in the presence of God.

FRIDAY 14th April – Good Friday

I do some of the very long walk from Wells to Downside that this year takes five hours.

As usual the Celebration of the Passion came to its climax with the hymn ‘When I survey the wondrous cross’ – the only hymn I know by heart.

In the evening I manage to go to confession. I am given the Magnificat to say as a penance. It is appropriate to what I have been thinking on the need for humility.

In a Lectio Divina group and later in a silent meditation we can think of the words of Jesus after the Resurrection:
“Do not be afraid…
Go tell my brothers, they must leave for Galilee.
They will see me there”.

SATURDAY 15th April – Holy Saturday

One always dreads the prospect of the Easter Vigil, so long, especially with a baptism in the middle, but by the end it’s like having gone a long spiritual run – you feel like you have covered the ground and achieved something and go to bed happy.

We have a talk in the afternoon on whether religion causes violence. Perhaps it is better to understand that religion does not cause violence, but originates out of the violence of human nature.

Are we locked permanently in a line of jealous triangles where we crave what others are and what others have just because we do not have it?

BELLINI, Baptism of Christ (1500-02), Oil on canvas, Santa Corona, Vicenza

SUNDAY 2nd April – Fifth Sunday in Lent

“… your interests, however, are not in the unspiritual but in the spiritual”
Romans 8:8-11.

MONDAY 3rd April

I go to the Baptism site on the River Jordan.

It is hot. I cool my feet in the narrow river. You could walk across it in less than a minute except the Israeli border guard hovering in the distance might shoot you. How tragic that this lovely, deeply historical place should be an armed border.

We say a little prayer and think on the words in Matthew 3:13-17.
“As soon as Jesus was baptised, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven opened and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice came from heaven, ‘This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased’”.

TUESDAY 4th April – St Isidore

I fly back from Jordan.

By 5.30 I am at Mass in the Cathedral.

My trip is quicker than the Israelites journey from the same place:
“The Israelites left Mount Hor by the road to the Sea of Suph, to skirt the land of Edom. On the way the people lost patience. They spoke against God and against Moses, ‘Why did you bring us out of Egypt to die in this wilderness?’”.
Numbers 21:4-9.

Certainly when you look down from Mount Nebo you look at a vast, burning, sandy wilderness but after twilight you can see the lights of Jerusalem. From the Baptism site it is only 28 kilometres, you could drive it in a couple of hours – except you cannot. Modern ‘rational’ men have closed the border.

When last I did the journey it took me all day.

WEDNESDAY 5th April

“I can see four men walking about freely in the heart of the fire without coming to any harm”
Daniel 3:14-20.

I love this picture of men walking around in the heart of a fire – it beggars belief.

THURSDAY 6th April

We drove to Lincolnshire.

Another warm day so I visit Chelsea Physic Garden. A place like this is timeless.

“I tell you most solemnly, before Abraham ever was I am”
John 8: 51-59.

FRIDAY 7th April

The weather is glorious in Lincolnshire. It is a day of surgeries.

Psalm 17
“My God is a rock in whom I take refuge”.

SATURDAY 8th April

I spend all afternoon by the lake fishing. Only one bite and it gets away.

Here you are truly in the countryside. The light first glistening on the water, then descending in an orange glow.

We are there hours but the time passes on rather swiftly.

The responsorial Psalm
“The Lord will guard us as a shepherd guards his flock”
Jeremiah 31:10-15.

ALBERTI, The Cardinal Virtues, Fresco, Sala Clementina, Vatican Palace, Rome

SUNDAY 26th March – 4th Sunday in Lent

I got to Mass in Westminster Cathedral. The Cardinal says it is our Christian duty to pray that God has mercy on the soul of the attacker. I make no comment. I am thinking of the fate of the rich man who did no more than not look after Lazarus at his gate and he is condemned to eternal fire. Why don’t all religious leaders stand up and say that if there is a heaven, murderers certainly have no place in it?

1 Samuel 16:
“… God does not see as man sees, man looks at appearances but the Lord looks at the heart”.

MONDAY 27th March

“Jesus left Samaria for Galilee. He himself had declared that there is no respect for a prophet in his own country”
John 4.

TUESDAY 28th March

We fly to Rome for the Vatican APPG visit.

I go to Mass in the Via della Conciliazione and then an official dinner at the Ambassador’s residence.

Rome, the climate, people, streets as always magical.

At one point, I wander into the back of the nuns’ chapel in the Piazza Farnese. They are singing vespers – literally an angelic sound, pius in its sound and tone.

WEDNESDAY 29th March

We go to a general audience in St Peter’s Square and then to a series of meetings starting with the child abuse section at the Gregorian University and then with a Chief Executive, an inspiring Mass at the Venerable English College and then a talk to the young students. One not so young, nearly forty, is truly impressive – his personal pastoral advice brings a tear to the eye.

THURSDAY 30th March

We are up early for Mass in the crypt above St Peter’s tomb and below the Basilica, thronged with people. The crypt is quiet with the tombs of the popes looking on – what an extraordinary place to hear Mass, literally in the centre of Western civilisation.

After, we have more meetings on migration and inter-faith dialogue. We have a robust dialogue with the Jesuit who heads up the Vatican’s Migrants’ Service. He seems to think we are not doing enough and he is perfectly entitled to speak his mind. We remind him that after the USA, we are the second biggest donor to Syria.

I walk back through busy streets from the Vatican to the station past cafés and restaurants heaving with tourists. It seems a long way from Syria. Do many come? Do we take enough? Easy to judge, difficult to do anything really useful.

FRIDAY 31st March

I take a train to Lincolnshire for a surgery then walk past the Old Church in Walesby. The greens are so rich here and coming into spring life. It really is more beautiful than anywhere else.

Psalm 33
“The Lord is close to the broken hearted”.

SATURDAY 1st April

I address the Conservative County Council candidates in Horncastle.

Psalm 7
“Lord God, I take refuge in you”.

ANGELICO, Annunciation (1440-42), Fresco, Convento di San Marco, Florence

SUNDAY 19th March – Third Sunday in Lent

We have a rare Tridentine Mass in the Osgodby Chapel, the same mass that was said here since it was built in 1793. A moving and beautiful experience.

John 4
“whoever drinks this water will get thirsty again…”

MONDAY 20th March – St Joseph

We are in London, waiting for the baby.

It is a good day to think of St Joseph, one of the most famous people in history who did nothing more than marry and stay faithful.

Entrance Antiphon
“Behold a faithful and prudent steward whom the Lord set over his household”.

TUESDAY 21st March

I ask a Health Question about the need for a new medical centre at Lincoln so we can encourage more GPs to train and work in Lincolnshire.

We little know what is going to happen to us: disaster or death may strike at any moment.

“Peter went up to Jesus and said, Lord how often must I forgive my brother if he wrongs me? As many as seven times? Jesus answered, not seven I tell you but seventy-seven times”
Matthew 18:21.

WEDNESDAY 22nd March

At 5am we have a new baby in the family. I have a PMQ and I ask the Prime Minister about the ‘symbolism’ of the Palace of Westminster.

Two and a half hours later, I am sitting in the Procedure Committee and all hell breaks out – we are being attacked. Armed gunmen round us up and we spend three hours sheltering in Westminster Abbey with a thousand other people. I wonder around for the first time ever and read all the amazing messages on the countless tombs.

Finally let out, I make my way to see our first grandchild – a beautiful little girl.

A day unlikely to be forgotten.

I wonder if it would have made a difference if someone sometime had told the attacker: “There is only one God and he is peace”.

Today’s entrance antiphon
“Let my steps be guided by your promise, may evil never rule me”.

THURSDAY 23rd March

The PM makes a statement.

I deliberately make reference to the fact that after the wartime destruction of the chamber, Mr Churchill and Mr Atlee refused to move out. I say ‘it is values that unite our nation … we will not be moved from our place or our values’.

I put it to the Leader of the Commons later that this is hardly the moment to disperse MPs and Peers all over Parliament Square.

Jeremiah 7:23-28
“… but they did not listen, they followed the dictates of their own evil hearts, refused to face me and turned their backs on me”.

FRIDAY 24th March

I take the train up to Lincolnshire for a surgery and our AGM. There are two topics of conversation: Brexit and terrorism.

I go for a walk when I get home. The church is open and I read Psalm 122
“I rejoiced with those who said to me ‘let us go to the House of the Lord’”.

SATURDAY 25th March – the Annunciation

It is the first beautiful, hot day in Lincolnshire.

I take Monty for two long walks, read Psalm 123 in our village church and in the evening we drive back to London for the grandchild.

Psalm 123
“I lift up my eyes to you … to you who sit enthroned in heaven”.

DUCCIO di Buoninsegna, Raising of Lazarus (1308-11), Tempera on wood, Kimbell Art Museum

SUNDAY 12th March – Second Sunday in Lent

We go to Mass at Bad Homburg.

Of course I cannot understand the sermon, but Universalis is to hand. The reading is from Matthew 17:1-9, the Transfiguration.

MONDAY 13th March

I attend a debate to liberalise abortion laws. We lose of course, as we always have done for fifty years.

Today’s Psalm is number 78
“… let your strong arm reprieve those condemned to die”.

TUESDAY 14th March

I speak in the budget debate supporting the Government’s difficult decision to balance the books through raising national insurance contributions. The very next day, the Government does a U-turn and reverses the policy. I make no friends by saying the present funding formula of the NHS is not sustainable with an ageing population. We have to get people to put more of their own money in through social insurance.

Matthew 23:1-12
“… do not be guided by what they do, because they do not practice what they preach”.

In the evening we have our last Mindfulness session.

We need it.

At dinner afterwards, Father Christopher of Worth Abbey comes up and I introduce him to our teacher. He says “we have been practicing mindfulness for fifteen-hundred years” and my teacher says later that the Buddhists have been practicing it for two-thousand years.

WEDNESDAY 15th March

I ask a Northern Ireland Question urging a deal on power sharing. Ten days after the election it is still not there.

Today’s Psalm is number 30
“Save me in your love, O Lord
Release me from the snares they have hidden
For you are my refuge, Lord
Into your hands I commend my spirit”.

THURSDAY 16th March

I take part in a statement on the takeover of Sky urging non-interference by politicians and later I chair Westminster Hall.

The reading is the one about Lazarus, the most difficult of all:
“They will not be convinced, even if someone should arise from the dead”
Luke 16.

FRIDAY 17th March – St Patrick

A day driving up to Lincolnshire.

“Above all, never let your love for each other grow insincere, since love covers over many a sin”.

SATURDAY 18th March

Psalm 102: “The Lord is compassion and love”.